salam and hi.
it has been i think 1 freaking year that i last updated in this blog. i amma lazy bum (slap on my head).
i really really really adore and respect those bloggers who are really keen on writing their blogs and keep the blogs updated. thumbs up guys! really
by the way, it's already the middle of december 2015. we have about 15 more days before the new year begins. and you know, the same ol' tradition of celebrating new year all over the world. and not forgetting, people will start asking around what's everyone's wish-list or even hopes. to be honest, i used to be one of those, but thinking that i like to dream a lot; like A LOT, so i think i will just drop that this coming 2016 :P
lots of things happened in 2015 and they were life-changing things i tell you. hmm, just let me keep it to myself. i have been planning to start on rambling in this blog again. let's hope i can consistenly writes in this blog, insyaALLAH amin. well, where there's a will, there gotta be a way isn't it? hahahaha let's see how long it would last. -_-"
and i have been planning to start study again. yes, you heard it correct. i am planning to take up masters degree class, by part time-- which means, hello sacrifaction. i know it's gonna take lot of money, time and energy, and most important of all, my priorities. i really really need to jumble up my life back and need to follow what i planned before i work. the time has come. another factor would be my sister, i think. she's in the middle of completing her masters degree in ukm now, full time mode. it would be easy for her since she's not working yet. so, she doesn't have to think for other commitments-- i mean work, priorities etc. lucky for her it is a-one-year-masters-programme, so she can finish that real soon and started looking for job. but not for me, it was a very different story. i need to consider many things before i really made up my mind to take up masters class.
but insyaALLAH, i will make that happen, eventhough i had to sacrifice my life. i know i might loose some, but hey, let's look at the brigther side, i may have achieve more. i don't know. just trying to be positive.
i think that would be all for now. till next time. hahaha i can't believe i am writing, again! hahaha oat on my shoulder.
p/s: my lecturer used to tell me, "just write whatever you wanted to tell. don't think" so here's the outcome :P
byeeeee :)
Wednesday, December 16, 2015
Friday, June 12, 2015
i am back :)
* spring cleaning the blog after abandoned it for almost 1 year and a half *
salam and hi to all,
at last i have the guts to write; again.
hahaha....i've been so so so busy with work and life lately that i literally abandoned this blog for a while. why did i said literally? i still do bloghopping and blogwalking some other times, it's just that i didn't have the feeling to write on my blog anymore.
but now i'm back :D
salam and hi to all,
at last i have the guts to write; again.
hahaha....i've been so so so busy with work and life lately that i literally abandoned this blog for a while. why did i said literally? i still do bloghopping and blogwalking some other times, it's just that i didn't have the feeling to write on my blog anymore.
but now i'm back :D
Sunday, July 21, 2013
bila rasa itu muncul
rasa itu kembali lagi setelah lama menghilang.
aku tak suka rasa yang satu ini, sebab ia buat aku terluka dan kecewa.
walaupun aku sendiri tak tahu sebabnya aku jadi begitu.
kadang-kadang aku rasa tidak adil kerana aku saja yang jadi mangsanya, sedangkan dia
tapi bila difikirkan kembali, wujudkah perasaan itu walau sekelumit di dalam hati dia?
sungguh aku tak tahu, dan hampir kadang malas untuk ambil tahu.
tapi semakin lama aku tipu diri sendiri, semakin banyak ia menghantui aku.
aku hanya insan biasa, punya hati yang paling dalam.
hati yang paling dalam itulah hati yang paling 'fragile' bak kata kawan-kawan,
ya, aku tak nafikan. memang aku ini sensitif dan cengeng, cepat saja air mata dan aku berkawan rapat.
Ya Allah Kau hilangkanlah rasa dalam hati aku ini.
aku dah tak sanggup nak berharap pada sesuatu yang tak pasti dan sesuatu yang mungkin bukan tertulis untuk aku lansung.
selama ini hanya harapan palsu yang aku selalu titipkan pada hati aku yang terpaling dalam itu.
dan cukuplah,
aku sudah tak mahu jadi penipu lagi.
aku tak suka rasa yang satu ini, sebab ia buat aku terluka dan kecewa.
walaupun aku sendiri tak tahu sebabnya aku jadi begitu.
kadang-kadang aku rasa tidak adil kerana aku saja yang jadi mangsanya, sedangkan dia
tapi bila difikirkan kembali, wujudkah perasaan itu walau sekelumit di dalam hati dia?
sungguh aku tak tahu, dan hampir kadang malas untuk ambil tahu.
tapi semakin lama aku tipu diri sendiri, semakin banyak ia menghantui aku.
aku hanya insan biasa, punya hati yang paling dalam.
hati yang paling dalam itulah hati yang paling 'fragile' bak kata kawan-kawan,
ya, aku tak nafikan. memang aku ini sensitif dan cengeng, cepat saja air mata dan aku berkawan rapat.
Ya Allah Kau hilangkanlah rasa dalam hati aku ini.
aku dah tak sanggup nak berharap pada sesuatu yang tak pasti dan sesuatu yang mungkin bukan tertulis untuk aku lansung.
selama ini hanya harapan palsu yang aku selalu titipkan pada hati aku yang terpaling dalam itu.
dan cukuplah,
aku sudah tak mahu jadi penipu lagi.
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
i love being random :D
Dunia takkan berakhir
Walau kini engkau tak disisi
Ku yakini aku mampu
Walau harus hidup tanpamu
(sakura, setelah hujan)
it's already 7th of Ramadhan, which means it has been a week of fasting month. and i really really feel that time do fly very fast nowadays.
Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah for giving me chances to 'taste' this holy month once again. i hope i'll be able to change for the better day by day, Ramadhan was actually the 'special' month that i have been waited throughout the year. i feel closer to Him the Almighty during Ramadhan and most impoertantly, i feel safe (not sure for what reason, but i did) and all the naughty negative thinking will dissapear during Ramadhan!
well, that's all for now. cheerio!
but before that enjoy some interesting quotes:
" we might be trapped with our gruesome experience of negative upbringing but we forgot that we still have the choice. it's in our hand. we decide" mac taylor, csi:ny season 9 ep 2
" live hell or live well, we decide" - hlovate
Walau kini engkau tak disisi
Ku yakini aku mampu
Walau harus hidup tanpamu
(sakura, setelah hujan)
it's already 7th of Ramadhan, which means it has been a week of fasting month. and i really really feel that time do fly very fast nowadays.
Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah for giving me chances to 'taste' this holy month once again. i hope i'll be able to change for the better day by day, Ramadhan was actually the 'special' month that i have been waited throughout the year. i feel closer to Him the Almighty during Ramadhan and most impoertantly, i feel safe (not sure for what reason, but i did) and all the naughty negative thinking will dissapear during Ramadhan!
well, that's all for now. cheerio!
but before that enjoy some interesting quotes:
" we might be trapped with our gruesome experience of negative upbringing but we forgot that we still have the choice. it's in our hand. we decide" mac taylor, csi:ny season 9 ep 2
" live hell or live well, we decide" - hlovate
Friday, July 5, 2013
upside down
arg tensennya!
air takde kat kuarters.
makanan dalam peti dah habis (leftover foods je ada :( )
kredit dah tamat tempoh, which means bbm takboleh guna
dahlah tinggal sengsorang tanpa housemate
all in ONE DAY!
i need my comfort food now, tapi nak masak camna air takde kat sini :(
alahaiii
and first time tengok dan alami sendiri macam mana keadaan langkawi yang sedang banjir
kalau dulu, pernah jugak terfikir macam mana pulau sekecil langkawi ni akan jadi kalau banjir, sekarang siap boleh tengok depan mata 'kolam sawah padi'
air takde kat kuarters.
makanan dalam peti dah habis (leftover foods je ada :( )
kredit dah tamat tempoh, which means bbm takboleh guna
dahlah tinggal sengsorang tanpa housemate
all in ONE DAY!
i need my comfort food now, tapi nak masak camna air takde kat sini :(
alahaiii
and first time tengok dan alami sendiri macam mana keadaan langkawi yang sedang banjir
kalau dulu, pernah jugak terfikir macam mana pulau sekecil langkawi ni akan jadi kalau banjir, sekarang siap boleh tengok depan mata 'kolam sawah padi'
Wednesday, July 3, 2013
spring song
I wish I had someone; who suddenly arrive
And show me how the flowers grow and come out in winter field
I wish I had someone new; tender to my heart
Someone who will share me precious time
And show me how the flowers grow and come out in winter field
I wish I had someone new; tender to my heart
Someone who will share me precious time
If I had pretty spring; at the corner of my heart
I will say goodbye to winter land, you so cruel the winter wind
and I will check the through the phone, the number is 131
Don’t you know the truth is in fine weather
I will say goodbye to winter land, you so cruel the winter wind
and I will check the through the phone, the number is 131
Don’t you know the truth is in fine weather
Friday, June 28, 2013
pervert taxi driver
yes, perverts.
in one of my days in langkawi, such a horrific experience.
that was my first encountered with perverts in langkawi and it happened to be the taxi driver! it was such a seriously scary and horrifying 30 minutes in my whole life.
my first impression of that taxi driver was quite positive; by looking at his age and talkativeness, but i guess somehow it was wrong to judge people by their outer appearance(in addition to the fact that it was my first time meeting with that kind of taxi driver)
and his talkativeness just crossed over the line when he started to ask me to call him 'abang' (eeuuww) instead of pakcik (what i call him earlier) and it gets pretty annoying and uncomfortable when he started to tell me things he was not supposed to tell outsiders about (u know what)
at that point, i began to 'read' the situation in the so-called taxi and what kind of conversation he was going to direct.
that he told me how lonely he was since his wife had just met with an accident,
that he showed me his old broken taxi,
that he told me men can get married to more than one wife but it's just women who wouldn't allow them to do so,
and how i lied by telling him i'd already engaged when he was telling me 'ruginya kalau dak baru ingat nak masuk' (read: flirting)
i was like OH CAN YOU JUST STOP THE TAXI, PLEASE? I WANNA GET OUT FROM UR TAXI NOW!
being a petrified and panic person i am, i quickly text-ed my sister to give me a call though at first she refused to do so. i secretly told her about the tax driver and Alhamdulillah, i really thanked ALLAH for He protect me from any unwanted and unpleasant things.
moral of the story: don't judge people by their outer appearance
in one of my days in langkawi, such a horrific experience.
that was my first encountered with perverts in langkawi and it happened to be the taxi driver! it was such a seriously scary and horrifying 30 minutes in my whole life.
my first impression of that taxi driver was quite positive; by looking at his age and talkativeness, but i guess somehow it was wrong to judge people by their outer appearance(in addition to the fact that it was my first time meeting with that kind of taxi driver)
and his talkativeness just crossed over the line when he started to ask me to call him 'abang' (eeuuww) instead of pakcik (what i call him earlier) and it gets pretty annoying and uncomfortable when he started to tell me things he was not supposed to tell outsiders about (u know what)
at that point, i began to 'read' the situation in the so-called taxi and what kind of conversation he was going to direct.
that he told me how lonely he was since his wife had just met with an accident,
that he showed me his old broken taxi,
that he told me men can get married to more than one wife but it's just women who wouldn't allow them to do so,
and how i lied by telling him i'd already engaged when he was telling me 'ruginya kalau dak baru ingat nak masuk' (read: flirting)
i was like OH CAN YOU JUST STOP THE TAXI, PLEASE? I WANNA GET OUT FROM UR TAXI NOW!
being a petrified and panic person i am, i quickly text-ed my sister to give me a call though at first she refused to do so. i secretly told her about the tax driver and Alhamdulillah, i really thanked ALLAH for He protect me from any unwanted and unpleasant things.
moral of the story: don't judge people by their outer appearance
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
that little escapism
Alhamdulillah i managed to pull through 13 days of 'ganti puasa' so far, without gastritis attacked me. i really hope i'll be able to 'pay' my fasting debts before the next Ramadhan coming up.
Alhamdulillah again, because i get to rest a bit tonight apart from my weekly-Tuesday-nights-routine; volunteering myself for math's extra class at school. and it really feel different to be able to have this time all on my own. priceless. ahh
i've been busy every night after school (i'm at evening session) with tuition classes and extra classes and camps etc. thus getting this little escapism i would call it, really makes me a happy girl at that :)
and tomorrow, back to normal routine. (still in denial state)
remember the word #escapism that i wrote in my previous entry? i guess having this 'me-time' can also be considered as little escapism, in the sense of escaping from busy life for a while.
and i came across a blog which wrote about little things that made her happy, and i guess i wanted to make that list too!uhm maybe in my next post :)
Alhamdulillah again, because i get to rest a bit tonight apart from my weekly-Tuesday-nights-routine; volunteering myself for math's extra class at school. and it really feel different to be able to have this time all on my own. priceless. ahh
i've been busy every night after school (i'm at evening session) with tuition classes and extra classes and camps etc. thus getting this little escapism i would call it, really makes me a happy girl at that :)
remember the word #escapism that i wrote in my previous entry? i guess having this 'me-time' can also be considered as little escapism, in the sense of escaping from busy life for a while.
and i came across a blog which wrote about little things that made her happy, and i guess i wanted to make that list too!uhm maybe in my next post :)
Sunday, June 23, 2013
#throwback: my korean drama madness
it has been quite sometimes since i really followed drama series be it malay, english, korean or japanese. and now i'm addicted to korean drama series, a gentleman's dignity! one of the reason why i had to follow that series was because of the lead actor, jang dong gun.
he never failed to amaze me with his acting skills as well as his charm look :D
and this is his first comeback after 12 years! wow
since i do not favour sad love story, hence this drama met my expectations. seriously korean dramas have been very cliche now and most of them rather portray the same story line again and again, and this comedic really prove me wrong. with all sorts of emotions; funny, romantic, serious, a bit sad, it really made me glued to my laptop screen (since i don't own a tv here in langkawi)
i have yet to finish watching the series though i already knew the ending (thanks to dramabeans) and i really enjoyed them so far. and i guess this drama will go to my favourite list along with king 2 hearts, 7th grade civil servant, all about eve and sungkyunkwan scandal.
p/s: why on earth am i writing a blog entry abut korean drama? i must've been outta my usual self. ahaks
he never failed to amaze me with his acting skills as well as his charm look :D
and this is his first comeback after 12 years! wow
since i do not favour sad love story, hence this drama met my expectations. seriously korean dramas have been very cliche now and most of them rather portray the same story line again and again, and this comedic really prove me wrong. with all sorts of emotions; funny, romantic, serious, a bit sad, it really made me glued to my laptop screen (since i don't own a tv here in langkawi)
i have yet to finish watching the series though i already knew the ending (thanks to dramabeans) and i really enjoyed them so far. and i guess this drama will go to my favourite list along with king 2 hearts, 7th grade civil servant, all about eve and sungkyunkwan scandal.
p/s: why on earth am i writing a blog entry abut korean drama? i must've been outta my usual self. ahaks
Saturday, June 22, 2013
random post
i was so determined to write again after a very very long hiatus. the urge and excitement that i used to feel when i write before, i desperately wanted to 'taste' that again. but i just don't know what to write. i guess i had already lost that 'touch' again. sigh
life has been quite smooth these days; with unexpected things happened around me and unexpected person asking and showing me too much questions, information, news. that was capital TOO MUCH and i don't think i can bear with that. escapism, the only thing i had in mind right now.
ramadhan is coming very very soon, it's like more or less 2 weeks from now, and i'm still struggling to replace those fasting 'holidays' i had last year, and most of that was because of my gastritis. seriously it was wayy too hard to 'ganti puasa' during non-fasting months since the temptation is higher than the holy month itself. imagine your colleagues are drinking iced tea right in front of your face during a hot sunny day! gahh that was really challenging i can tell.
but being me, the last minute person, i had no choice but to endure that 'pain'.
nevermind, i don't have to eat and can diet *try to have positive thoughts throughout my 15 days of ganti puasa!*
yess, you read it correct, 15 freaking days of ganti puasa! can you imagine that?
me?? pengsan dah *_*
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
emptiness
Some days I don't know if I am wrong or right
Your mind is playing tricks on you, my dear
'Cause though the truth may vary
This ship will carry
Our bodies safe to shore
'little talks'-of monsters and men
Your mind is playing tricks on you, my dear
'Cause though the truth may vary
This ship will carry
Our bodies safe to shore
'little talks'-of monsters and men
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
school stories part 2
i've shared some of my school stories in here last year, and still found them funny. hahaha. so, i'm going to share another stories, about them kiddos; their innocent nature and hidden talent as a joker :D
#1
i'm teaching mathematics for this one class, the first class of standard 2. there are lots (MANY) naughty and cheeky little kids in this class, and i can assure you won't have any pressure teaching these types of kids. their cheekiness and boldness can sometimes drive you crazy. haha.
one day, after giving them work and get them busy with those numbers, i called several pupils to the teacher's desk to check their book. three boys(the naughtiest in class) and a girl came to me with their books.
adam: teacher ni apa benda ni? (while referring to some ornaments he's been playing with on my handbag)
teacher illi: jangan main dengan handbag teacher. bak sini buku awak (take the bag and put it further from him)
and i continued with checking and marking their books without noticing what's happening with them boys and my handbag.
after a while, i heard some giggles and laughter, very close to my ears. i looked up and saw them busy playing with it, one of them were 'sweeping' the desk with that ornament and another two applying the ornament on their cheek and make it looks like a blusher brush.
oh my goodness, ALLAH please give me strength to go through this.
#2
in my class, 3 intelek. the last class. i had this tendency since i first taught last year; i like to initiate a word and let them students continue to what i mean. for example,
teacher illi: ok class, what is this? (showing them a picture of dessert- custard pudding)
students: ...........
teacher illi: ok, again. class, do you know what is this? puddd... (with the intention they will continue with the word pudding)
students: pudarrrr! (with absolute confident)
teacher illi: no, this is pudding. now repeat after me. PUDDING.
students: PUDDING.
teacher illi: good, well done class! ok now pudding is a type of dessert. do you know what is the meaning of dessert? (i already taught them the word last year)
students: .....................
teacher illi: pencuci......( tolonglah sambung ayat teacher ni =.=')
student A: pencuci tangan.
student B: pencuci gigi
student C: wei, salahlah. pencuci tandas kan teacher?
teacher illi: %$^#%$^&*()*&(^$#@#!@ (seriously rasa nak hempas muka ke dinding =.=')
#3
in a relief class, 2 cemerlang. there was this one boy, radzmer israf, he's not that well, i mean he can be considered as one of those special needy kid yet he's such a brilliant boy. he's gifted with spontaneous reaction. seriously!
i had to relief an english class and being an opportunist that i am, i decided to taught them english. i taught them about ordinal numbers, first second third yada yada yada.
in the middle of my teaching, he suddenly stood up and yelled, first! first! first! first! first! and another second he sat down and went completely silent.
i was quite shocked and went blur of what had just happen. after a while, i chose to ignore that.
the same thing happen again, this time he went up to the front, took the marker from me and wrote down his name on the whiteboard. RADZMER ISRAF. a big one.
and went up to me again to give the marker back, he continued 'strolling' around the class like a boss, like there's nothing happen in the class leaving me with question marks on my face!
and i quickly felt dizzy afterwards =.='
#4
several parents went to the staffroom to give the money for PTA's fund, and they happened to search for my colleagues, kak wani but she wasn't there. so i decided to entertain and asking them how can i help. they handed me the money for the fund on behalf of their kids and i promised to give the money once kak wani is back in staffroom.
so i continue with my work and totally forgot about the money. during recess, one of kak wani's students cried and said he wanted to go back. so she asked the boy to wait for her in the staffroom. the second he saw me, he quickly went
student d: teacher ni yang ambik duit saya tadi tu teacher wani. (while crying)
kak wani: ??
me: ?????
kak wani: duit apa? takkan teacher illi ambik duit kamu?
student d: tadi saya nampak dia ambik duit mak saya bagi kat teacher.
me: opss kak wani sori terlupa nak bagi duit PIBG. ada parents nak jumpa tdi tapi kak wani takdak, jadi dia wakilkan saya bagi duit pada kak wani. (handed the money over to kak wani)
student d: haa kan betul teacher. teacher ni amik duit saya tadi. (suddelny he stopped crying)
me: ???
kak wani: sabaq la illi, bebudak ni bukanny faham pun orang mintak tolong. hahaha ignore ja.
me: ???? (still tak puas hati tak pasal2 dituduh ambil duit pelajar)
after a while, kak wani told me the boy doesn't want to go back. he already found what he lost, the money that i took! :(
=.='
no matter what, i really enjoyed myself teaching innocent little kiddos. i love my job <3>
#1
i'm teaching mathematics for this one class, the first class of standard 2. there are lots (MANY) naughty and cheeky little kids in this class, and i can assure you won't have any pressure teaching these types of kids. their cheekiness and boldness can sometimes drive you crazy. haha.
one day, after giving them work and get them busy with those numbers, i called several pupils to the teacher's desk to check their book. three boys(the naughtiest in class) and a girl came to me with their books.
adam: teacher ni apa benda ni? (while referring to some ornaments he's been playing with on my handbag)
teacher illi: jangan main dengan handbag teacher. bak sini buku awak (take the bag and put it further from him)
and i continued with checking and marking their books without noticing what's happening with them boys and my handbag.
after a while, i heard some giggles and laughter, very close to my ears. i looked up and saw them busy playing with it, one of them were 'sweeping' the desk with that ornament and another two applying the ornament on their cheek and make it looks like a blusher brush.
on the left; the so-called broom and blusher brush :D
oh my goodness, ALLAH please give me strength to go through this.
#2
in my class, 3 intelek. the last class. i had this tendency since i first taught last year; i like to initiate a word and let them students continue to what i mean. for example,
teacher illi: ok class, what is this? (showing them a picture of dessert- custard pudding)
students: ...........
teacher illi: ok, again. class, do you know what is this? puddd... (with the intention they will continue with the word pudding)
students: pudarrrr! (with absolute confident)
teacher illi: no, this is pudding. now repeat after me. PUDDING.
students: PUDDING.
teacher illi: good, well done class! ok now pudding is a type of dessert. do you know what is the meaning of dessert? (i already taught them the word last year)
students: .....................
teacher illi: pencuci......( tolonglah sambung ayat teacher ni =.=')
student A: pencuci tangan.
student B: pencuci gigi
student C: wei, salahlah. pencuci tandas kan teacher?
teacher illi: %$^#%$^&*()*&(^$#@#!@ (seriously rasa nak hempas muka ke dinding =.=')
#3
in a relief class, 2 cemerlang. there was this one boy, radzmer israf, he's not that well, i mean he can be considered as one of those special needy kid yet he's such a brilliant boy. he's gifted with spontaneous reaction. seriously!
i had to relief an english class and being an opportunist that i am, i decided to taught them english. i taught them about ordinal numbers, first second third yada yada yada.
in the middle of my teaching, he suddenly stood up and yelled, first! first! first! first! first! and another second he sat down and went completely silent.
i was quite shocked and went blur of what had just happen. after a while, i chose to ignore that.
the same thing happen again, this time he went up to the front, took the marker from me and wrote down his name on the whiteboard. RADZMER ISRAF. a big one.
and went up to me again to give the marker back, he continued 'strolling' around the class like a boss, like there's nothing happen in the class leaving me with question marks on my face!
and i quickly felt dizzy afterwards =.='
#4
several parents went to the staffroom to give the money for PTA's fund, and they happened to search for my colleagues, kak wani but she wasn't there. so i decided to entertain and asking them how can i help. they handed me the money for the fund on behalf of their kids and i promised to give the money once kak wani is back in staffroom.
so i continue with my work and totally forgot about the money. during recess, one of kak wani's students cried and said he wanted to go back. so she asked the boy to wait for her in the staffroom. the second he saw me, he quickly went
student d: teacher ni yang ambik duit saya tadi tu teacher wani. (while crying)
kak wani: ??
me: ?????
kak wani: duit apa? takkan teacher illi ambik duit kamu?
student d: tadi saya nampak dia ambik duit mak saya bagi kat teacher.
me: opss kak wani sori terlupa nak bagi duit PIBG. ada parents nak jumpa tdi tapi kak wani takdak, jadi dia wakilkan saya bagi duit pada kak wani. (handed the money over to kak wani)
student d: haa kan betul teacher. teacher ni amik duit saya tadi. (suddelny he stopped crying)
me: ???
kak wani: sabaq la illi, bebudak ni bukanny faham pun orang mintak tolong. hahaha ignore ja.
me: ???? (still tak puas hati tak pasal2 dituduh ambil duit pelajar)
after a while, kak wani told me the boy doesn't want to go back. he already found what he lost, the money that i took! :(
=.='
no matter what, i really enjoyed myself teaching innocent little kiddos. i love my job <3>
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
february 2013
it's been a while since i last wrote in here. i'm just plain lazy though ideas are flowing like waterfall (ceh!)
was quite busy preparing for the big day, and since it was the first time ever in my family hence the excitement is all over the place! we can't wait for the event actually and alhamdulillah, 90% of them preparations have been done successfully.
school routines and life has been normal these days, just like the other normal days. but this year many funny stories have been collected and i'm just waiting for the right time to wrote them down (coz i'm too lazy to put them together now :P)
that's all for now. cheerio!
was quite busy preparing for the big day, and since it was the first time ever in my family hence the excitement is all over the place! we can't wait for the event actually and alhamdulillah, 90% of them preparations have been done successfully.
school routines and life has been normal these days, just like the other normal days. but this year many funny stories have been collected and i'm just waiting for the right time to wrote them down (coz i'm too lazy to put them together now :P)
that's all for now. cheerio!
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
my not so good raya story
Ramadhan had just passed by us, and left me with thousand memories of my first year 'celebrating' here in Langkawi. well many new things rose and happened; only in Ramadhan mind you :D
it felt like just yesterday we had been fasting and now it was time for raya, again.
raya celebration this year was way different from those we usually had every year. maybe due to inexistance of the elderlies, hence the difference. by not having them in the house, it actually add on to those so-called emptiness; both in our heart as much as the house itself. and it felt a bit awkward not to have any elderlies in the house, since we were so used with them tok and tokki being with us like forever, before.
seriously this raya was the worst for me, for there's no 'salam-cium-tangan-dengan-ma-pa-dan-tok' thingy and there's no photoshoot (so to speak) amongst us, after the prayers. guess what, it was even more happening when we went to our relatives and had a small celebration there. but i really did feel awkward since i was not that close with them.
my closest yet so far cousin, wa who had just married was for sure were with her husband, and it left us 5 siblings on our own. thank God she was there on the first hari raya though they had to rush back to kedah after that. if not boredom would be our very word to describe our raya.
at the end of the day, i guess i should be prepared to experience the same raya next year since everyone's getting married and will definitely go back to their in laws house. well, lani's joining the group next year and she's been telling us that she'll be celebrated raya at kedah next year. sigh -.-
p/s: no official raya photo this year, hence no photo uploaded :P
it felt like just yesterday we had been fasting and now it was time for raya, again.
raya celebration this year was way different from those we usually had every year. maybe due to inexistance of the elderlies, hence the difference. by not having them in the house, it actually add on to those so-called emptiness; both in our heart as much as the house itself. and it felt a bit awkward not to have any elderlies in the house, since we were so used with them tok and tokki being with us like forever, before.
seriously this raya was the worst for me, for there's no 'salam-cium-tangan-dengan-ma-pa-dan-tok' thingy and there's no photoshoot (so to speak) amongst us, after the prayers. guess what, it was even more happening when we went to our relatives and had a small celebration there. but i really did feel awkward since i was not that close with them.
my closest yet so far cousin, wa who had just married was for sure were with her husband, and it left us 5 siblings on our own. thank God she was there on the first hari raya though they had to rush back to kedah after that. if not boredom would be our very word to describe our raya.
at the end of the day, i guess i should be prepared to experience the same raya next year since everyone's getting married and will definitely go back to their in laws house. well, lani's joining the group next year and she's been telling us that she'll be celebrated raya at kedah next year. sigh -.-
p/s: no official raya photo this year, hence no photo uploaded :P
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Ramadhan
Ramadhan is here folks! Alhamdulillah ALLAH had been very kind for He let me alive to "taste" Ramdhan this year; once again. Alhamdulillah thumma Alhamdulillah :)
nothing much to be talked about during this holy month. and i'm going back home EVERY WEEK (yes, you read it correct, EVERY WEEK mind you :D ) to break fast and had 'sahur' with dear family. am so excited about it, though i'm used to break fast and had sahur with them friends for 6 years! haha couldn't care much since i'm closer to home when i'm in langkawi compared to kuala lumpur :D
well as usual the children's behaviour made my day, and having to see them during fasting month was truly an experience for me. hehe, funnier that i thought it would be. that stort would come later, ya!
as for now, gotta go. got things to attend to. take care and have a blessed Ramadhan everyone :)
nothing much to be talked about during this holy month. and i'm going back home EVERY WEEK (yes, you read it correct, EVERY WEEK mind you :D ) to break fast and had 'sahur' with dear family. am so excited about it, though i'm used to break fast and had sahur with them friends for 6 years! haha couldn't care much since i'm closer to home when i'm in langkawi compared to kuala lumpur :D
well as usual the children's behaviour made my day, and having to see them during fasting month was truly an experience for me. hehe, funnier that i thought it would be. that stort would come later, ya!
as for now, gotta go. got things to attend to. take care and have a blessed Ramadhan everyone :)
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
perpisahan terasing
Di kala penuh ketakutan dengan badai kehidupan,
Ku bersyukur adanya kamu ,
Biarlah kehilangan semua yang dimiliki di dunia,
Asal masih adanya kamu - Anuar Zain, Sedetik Lebih
semakin meningkat dewasa semakin banyak benda yang berubah, di sekelilingku. dan jauh di sudut hati aku tak berapa gemarkan semua perubahan ini.
mungkin kerana aku bukanlah seorang yang mudah untuk terima perubahan tambahan pula kalau ia melibatkan perihal hidup peribadi.
Ku bersyukur adanya kamu ,
Biarlah kehilangan semua yang dimiliki di dunia,
Asal masih adanya kamu - Anuar Zain, Sedetik Lebih
semakin meningkat dewasa semakin banyak benda yang berubah, di sekelilingku. dan jauh di sudut hati aku tak berapa gemarkan semua perubahan ini.
mungkin kerana aku bukanlah seorang yang mudah untuk terima perubahan tambahan pula kalau ia melibatkan perihal hidup peribadi.
one of my favourite cousin, we are the 2nd child among 5 siblings and we are december babies :D
ever since my fav cousin and my bestest friend were married to their spouses, there's a little gap between us. i don't know why i had this feeling, could it be because of the close attachment between us?
well, i don't know.
seperti yang aku nyatakan dalam entri sebelum-sebelum ni, gambar hanya dapat menyimpan kenangan kita sahaja tapi tidak perasaan yang mengiringi kenangan itu.
mungkin aku juga perlu ikut jejak langkah mereka, tapi tunggulah 'masa' itu belum sampai lagi. insyaALLAH perancangan ALLAH tiada siapa yang tahu.
school stories
one thing that i like the most being a teacher was the moments with the students. seriously you can never get angry with them! looking at their cute little innocent faces definitely makes your heart melts in a second.
story 1
there was one time where i was so mad with the whole class since they forgot (or rather didn't finished my homework) to bring their book, and i ordered all of them to stand on their chair. suddenly a boy (the smallest in the class) came to me and said,
"teacher teacher tiba-tiba saya terjumpa buku saya dalam beg. tadi cari tak ada pun" with his innocent tone.
then i asked him,
"ooh magicnya buku awak ni. macam chipsmore pun ada, sekejap ada sekejap tak ada. habis tu homework teacher bagi semalam siap tak?"
"hehe terlupa nak buatlah teacher. semalam pi mengaji quran"
"lepas mengaji kan boleh buat?"
"lepas mengaji selalunya saya tengok tv pastu saya kena tidoq dah"
i don't have anything much to say afterwards.
story 2
i was teaching standard 2 (last class) about phonemes, sounds and such. as i was busy pronouncing all thosesilly sounds ( peh, deh, keh, leh, meh etc), several students said loudly,
"teacher pasai apa bunyi dia pelik sangat?"
"teacher dalam bahasa bi ni memang a b c depa bunyi lain eh?"
while these boys were busy complaining and chit chatting about thesilly sounds, the other students continue with the phonemes (sounds very convincing)
"pah"
"dah"
"mah"
"lah"
teacher mereka? cepuk dan tepuk dahi. ingat ni nama jiran kamu semua ke? adoi pengsanlah saya macam ni
story 3
it was my school sports day and i was in charged with all the so-called athletes and little participants for sukaneka. most of those who took part in sukaneka was from standard 1 and 2. as i was approaching them to take their names and line up, suddenly a boy came and gave his name.
"teacher nama saya tulis dak lagi?"
"nama kamu apa?"
"ahmad zahid, 2B"
"ok teacher dah tulis, now pergi beratur kat belakang kawan kamu tu" (with finger pointing to the boys' line)
while walking to his friend, sempat lagi dia cakap
"banyaknya benda putih-putih bintik-bintik atas muka teacher" (read: jerawat)
teacher illi: &(*%^$%#@^?!"
story 4
in my class and i'm sitting at teacher's desk, marking their books one by one with them standing besides me.
now it's this boy's turn, he went to me smiling and listening to my comments about his book.
after i'm done with him, he suddenly sai,
"teacher ada apa kat bawah mulut teacher yang warna putih tu?"
"haa? kat bawah mulut teacher? ada apa?"
"tu ada teacher kat bawah tu, dia macam warna putih camtu"
meraba-raba bawah mulut dan ,
"haih jerawat bawah mulut pun dia nak tegur" (dalam hati)
-.-
kids are still kids, very innocent. apa yang mereka nampak, itulah yang akan diberitahu kepada kita
story 1
there was one time where i was so mad with the whole class since they forgot (or rather didn't finished my homework) to bring their book, and i ordered all of them to stand on their chair. suddenly a boy (the smallest in the class) came to me and said,
"teacher teacher tiba-tiba saya terjumpa buku saya dalam beg. tadi cari tak ada pun" with his innocent tone.
then i asked him,
"ooh magicnya buku awak ni. macam chipsmore pun ada, sekejap ada sekejap tak ada. habis tu homework teacher bagi semalam siap tak?"
"hehe terlupa nak buatlah teacher. semalam pi mengaji quran"
"lepas mengaji kan boleh buat?"
"lepas mengaji selalunya saya tengok tv pastu saya kena tidoq dah"
i don't have anything much to say afterwards.
******************************************************
i was teaching standard 2 (last class) about phonemes, sounds and such. as i was busy pronouncing all those
"teacher pasai apa bunyi dia pelik sangat?"
"teacher dalam bahasa bi ni memang a b c depa bunyi lain eh?"
while these boys were busy complaining and chit chatting about the
"pah"
"dah"
"mah"
"lah"
teacher mereka? cepuk dan tepuk dahi. ingat ni nama jiran kamu semua ke? adoi pengsanlah saya macam ni
******************************************************
it was my school sports day and i was in charged with all the so-called athletes and little participants for sukaneka. most of those who took part in sukaneka was from standard 1 and 2. as i was approaching them to take their names and line up, suddenly a boy came and gave his name.
"teacher nama saya tulis dak lagi?"
"nama kamu apa?"
"ahmad zahid, 2B"
"ok teacher dah tulis, now pergi beratur kat belakang kawan kamu tu" (with finger pointing to the boys' line)
while walking to his friend, sempat lagi dia cakap
"banyaknya benda putih-putih bintik-bintik atas muka teacher" (read: jerawat)
teacher illi: &(*%^$%#@^?!"
******************************************************
in my class and i'm sitting at teacher's desk, marking their books one by one with them standing besides me.
now it's this boy's turn, he went to me smiling and listening to my comments about his book.
after i'm done with him, he suddenly sai,
"teacher ada apa kat bawah mulut teacher yang warna putih tu?"
"haa? kat bawah mulut teacher? ada apa?"
"tu ada teacher kat bawah tu, dia macam warna putih camtu"
meraba-raba bawah mulut dan ,
"haih jerawat bawah mulut pun dia nak tegur" (dalam hati)
-.-
kids are still kids, very innocent. apa yang mereka nampak, itulah yang akan diberitahu kepada kita
Friday, June 22, 2012
melewati waktu itu
Looking back on younger days, the time has passed, And nothing stays the same, Hey Hey Hey! - Walk Away, Dia Frampton
adalah susah untuk kita lewati kembali waktu-waktu yang telah pergi, semua memori itu hanya akan terlipat kemas dalam ingatan sahaja. maka sebab itu kita akan membuat sesuatu untuk buatkan kenangan itu kekal, salah satunya dengan menangkap gambar. ya, itulah cara yang paling mudah dan well, terkini seperti zaman sekarang.
namun perasaan yang mengiringi kenangan itu tak mungkin dapat di'letak'kan diatas foto. hanya akan tersimpan di sanubari.
adalah susah untuk kita lewati kembali waktu-waktu yang telah pergi, semua memori itu hanya akan terlipat kemas dalam ingatan sahaja. maka sebab itu kita akan membuat sesuatu untuk buatkan kenangan itu kekal, salah satunya dengan menangkap gambar. ya, itulah cara yang paling mudah dan well, terkini seperti zaman sekarang.
namun perasaan yang mengiringi kenangan itu tak mungkin dapat di'letak'kan diatas foto. hanya akan tersimpan di sanubari.
aku tak punya harta melainkan mereka-mereka ini <3
them cousins :)
love of my life :D
my bestest cousin in crime a.k.a kawan kacip bak kata lanie :)
le siblings in le polaroid
lastly, nah bunga untuk kamu :P
bila rasa itu datang
Cubalah tuk mengerti aku, Seperti aku yang mengerti semua tentang dirimu- 3 Suara; Semua Isi Hatimu
oleh sebab aku rasa nak tulis kat sini sangat-sangat, jadi lahirlah entri ini :D
belakangan ni aku selalu terasa teringin nak menulis balik, seperti yang aku pernah buat masa dulu-dulu. dan aku rasa aku banyak in denial sekarang ni, kenapa? sebab sikap aku yang selalu suka bertangguh buatkan aku selalu 'menuduh' masa tak pernah cukup untuk aku walhal sebenarnya bukanlah sibuk manapun. aku masih lagi mampu untuk menulis barang satu atau dua bab, but being me, a real procrastinator i am.
aku masih lagi punyai sikap-sikap negatif yang aku rasa banyak merugikan diri aku sendiri. tak perlulah untuk aku senaraikan apakah sikap-sikap itu, cukuplah hanya kawan-kawan rapat dan keluarga terdekat sahaja yang 'telan' fakta itu. aku maklum bahawa bukanlah satu kesalahan jika aku ini tak sempurna, aku tahu semua orang tak sempurna, ALLAH sahaja :)
dan aku dalam proses untuk membuang semua sikap-sikap itu sikit demi sedikit. memang agak payah untuk terus buangnya sebab ia dah sebati dengan aku selama 25 tahun yang lepas tapi with a strong will, nothing is impossible.
banyak cerita langkawi yang aku nak kongsikan tapi mungkin di entri seterusnya pula.
oleh sebab aku rasa nak tulis kat sini sangat-sangat, jadi lahirlah entri ini :D
belakangan ni aku selalu terasa teringin nak menulis balik, seperti yang aku pernah buat masa dulu-dulu. dan aku rasa aku banyak in denial sekarang ni, kenapa? sebab sikap aku yang selalu suka bertangguh buatkan aku selalu 'menuduh' masa tak pernah cukup untuk aku walhal sebenarnya bukanlah sibuk manapun. aku masih lagi mampu untuk menulis barang satu atau dua bab, but being me, a real procrastinator i am.
aku masih lagi punyai sikap-sikap negatif yang aku rasa banyak merugikan diri aku sendiri. tak perlulah untuk aku senaraikan apakah sikap-sikap itu, cukuplah hanya kawan-kawan rapat dan keluarga terdekat sahaja yang 'telan' fakta itu. aku maklum bahawa bukanlah satu kesalahan jika aku ini tak sempurna, aku tahu semua orang tak sempurna, ALLAH sahaja :)
dan aku dalam proses untuk membuang semua sikap-sikap itu sikit demi sedikit. memang agak payah untuk terus buangnya sebab ia dah sebati dengan aku selama 25 tahun yang lepas tapi with a strong will, nothing is impossible.
banyak cerita langkawi yang aku nak kongsikan tapi mungkin di entri seterusnya pula.
motif gambar? saje saje sebab aku tengah gila dengan drama ni jadi aku letaklah gambar ni :D
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
why things can't be the same they used to be?
school holidays was just over and it was not really holidays for me, i would say. i was quite busy helping and arranging things for my cousin's wedding. the first cousin who got married in the family. so i guess you can imagine the excitement and the happiness surrounded everyone for almost everyday towards the big day.
so problems aside and i went home with an empty heart, leaving all the workloads and problems i encountered in schools. and for the first time since i started my life here in langkawi, i feel peace , in my heart. really. and my mind was all set for holidays. no other things.
i guess life has taught me many things lately, especially. the whole different lessons from the one i got during my life as a student. well, maybe i'm becoming more and more matured then only i get to see other side of life, which i didn't favor at all. as what they said, life must go on, so yeah just go with the flow.
i've been praying very hard to Him the Almighty to get rid of my bad behaviour and my short-tempered, seriously. i didn't know why on earth nowadays i get emotional very easy, seriously and seriously. and I HATE THIS! i hate it when i'm emotional and involved others as well, especially my family. i want things to go back as normal again, the time when i just keep everything to myself and when i'm emotional, i still keep things to myself. coz its ok for me to get hurt rather than seeing others being hurt by me. its saddening and pathetic i know.
i hate myself now. capital SERIOUSLY!
so problems aside and i went home with an empty heart, leaving all the workloads and problems i encountered in schools. and for the first time since i started my life here in langkawi, i feel peace , in my heart. really. and my mind was all set for holidays. no other things.
*****************************************************
i guess life has taught me many things lately, especially. the whole different lessons from the one i got during my life as a student. well, maybe i'm becoming more and more matured then only i get to see other side of life, which i didn't favor at all. as what they said, life must go on, so yeah just go with the flow.
i've been praying very hard to Him the Almighty to get rid of my bad behaviour and my short-tempered, seriously. i didn't know why on earth nowadays i get emotional very easy, seriously and seriously. and I HATE THIS! i hate it when i'm emotional and involved others as well, especially my family. i want things to go back as normal again, the time when i just keep everything to myself and when i'm emotional, i still keep things to myself. coz its ok for me to get hurt rather than seeing others being hurt by me. its saddening and pathetic i know.
i hate myself now. capital SERIOUSLY!
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