of being judgemental

salam and hi to all,

it’s been a while since i wrote anything beneficial and so-called informative/ motivation in this blog. i rarely updated simply coz there are so many things inside (the brain) that makes it hard for me to decode them in words. well, i’m never good with words you see :\

what i’m going to brag about here is the same thing, over and over again which i hated the most.

personally, i don’t like to be judged through my outer appearance. i would rather like people to see me as who i am, through the way i speak about something, my opinions as well as how i carry myself.

i guess attitude and inner self are more important and should be well taken care of. coz what we have inside will be reflected through our acts and words, aite?

rasanya bila orang menilai kita dari segi perlakuan dan kata-kata, benda ni akan lebih membuatkan kita berhati-hati dan berfikir-fikir sebelum menulis/ berkata-kata tentang sesuatu. indirectly, kita akan lebih menjaga lidah supaya bukan senang-senang nak keluarkan apa yang ada dalam hati kita. well, ada benda yang boleh disclose pada public tapi ada benda yang perlu diprivatekan. kita perlu belajar banyak lagi pasal ni.

i’m both not a very vocal person, i would rather type/ write what i feel rather than speak sebab saya ni mudah kehilangan kata-kata. saya tidak reti untuk argue dengan orang pasal sesuatu unless i know about it thick and thin, then i have the guts to say what i have to say (belum tentu betul dan orang lain dengar) (that’s why i’m never in the debate team while at school ~~just kidding)

i have quite a low self esteem you see, that makes me feel inferior to sometimes speak up what i feel inside. besides, to avoid people from having negative perspective about me. i’m quite particular when it comes about other people’s opinion about me, which makes me a bit defensive when it comes to certain issues.

hmmm...well, i guess that’s about it. its quite tedious to start again what we left behind few months/ years back. so, i need to start from scratch. have to read a lot and definitely, watch a lot ( err, i mean those educational and informational tv programmes)

till then, bye bye

cherished every moments

aku rasa blog ni agak dry tanpa gambar, so to start with, kita enjoy gambar k

them, whom i <3 the most in the whole world

love them tooo :)

bestest buddy :)

coy sengal

bertiga~

wa, my bestest cousin in crime :P

i'm back :)

salam and hi to all,

last entry wrote was in may 2011, which means its almost a month and plus plus i didn't wrote or rant here. there goes my new resolution =.='

but, i guess it's ok since i've got lots of things to be done (excuses je ni) and alhamdulillah, all the importants things are settled and i'm officially jobless and soon-to-be-graduand :)

i'm a happy girl at that and Thank You ALLAH million zillion trillion times for making everything easy for me, for making all the tough and rough ways easy for me to sail through and everything Ya Rahman. i can never list down how much He helped me and how grateful i am for all these while. again, THANK YOU ALLAH ^^

ok, dah sudah. kita citer benda lain plak k.

sekarang ni aku secara rasminya memegang title penanam anggur a.k.a penganggur a.k.a jobless, tengah tunggu result posting je skarang ni. baru je lepas kursus 3 hari KISSM dan sangat lega dah habis banyak benda2 penting. skarang ni hanya perlu memikirkan pasal masa depan je, kalau boleh nak rancang baik2. sesungguhnya perancangan ALLAH itu lebih baik dari perancangan aku, jadi biarlah apa yang aku rancang diberkati. aminnn ~~

dah lebih kurang sebulan nak masuk 2 bulan jugak la melepak kat rumah tak buat apa, bukanlah tak buat apa as in makan tido makan tido je, tolong la juga wat keje rumah sume2 tapi kerja yang betul2 kerja tu takdelah. setakat ni gumbira je bangun lewat, baca novel ikut suka hati nak baca bila, surf tenet sampai hampir nak masuk dalam komputer, makan tak ingat dah penimbang, kuar jalan2 sampai rasa mesti orang perasan muka yang sama asyik kuar masuk kedai dia dan mcm2 lagi lah! kesimpulannya, hidup mcm ni memang heaven tapi kalau sampai berbulan2 kena buat mcm ni, alamatnya hidup aku ni tak produktif langsung langsung langsung lah!

bila hidup tak produktif cmni, mulalah rasa rendah diri lah, tak bersyukur lah, mcm2 lah...padahal orang lain nak je hidup macam apa yang aku alami skrang ni. hmmmm....mcm tulah manusia tak pernah nak bersyukur :(

aku rasa untuk atasi kebosanan tahap melampau lebih dari bosan tahao gaban ni, aku perlu cari hobi baru, boring jugak asyik2 baca novel n tengok tv, seriously kena carik hobi baru..

hmmm...let us think

memasak? tak yah, dah slalu buat, tak sedap mana pun
menjahit? tangan aku kasar, tak sesuai untuk jahitan halus
berkebun? i'm not a 'green hand', nnti hbis pokok aku kerjakan
mengemas? dah slalu buat, bosanlah wat benda yang sama.... next please
buat kad kreatif? hmmmm....mcm menarik je idea ni...hahahahaha...akan dipertimbangkan kemudian

oklah, rasanya takat tu je lah kot untuk hari ni, insyaALLAH esok kalau ada mood nak menulis, kita jumpa lagi ye, kalau tak, tunggu je lah 1-2 minggu/ bulan lepas ni..hehehe :P

till then, bye bye bye :) <3

random ramblings

salam and hi to all,

lagi beberapa hari je nak final exam last paper memang last punya la, tpi satu habuk pun tk study lagi. adoih, mood takde payah jugak nak study nya. hmmm takpe2 kita cari mood dulu, bila mood ada brulah study, kata orang study smart not study hard, tak gitu :P

so, sementara nak mencari mood ni (kebetulan ade kat rumah), lagilah sesi 'pencarian' tu susah, bukan apa, kat rumah semua ada, tak mcm hidup sendiri2 kat tempat orang tu, payahhh.. semua nya atas kita, makan, pakai, duit etc.

kalao kat rumah ni, makanan tersedia, pakaian tu biasalah, duit mak ayah punye *big grin*
kalo hidup sendiri2 tu, breakfast memang sah2 tak makan, brunch terus, jimat duit katanya. sambil2 makan brunch, dah kena fikir untuk makan malam pulak. pastu nak masak ke nak beli, kalau time elaun masyuk, memang dah tak pandang dah dapur tu *berlagak gila dengar :P*
semua pakat2 penuhkan fast food restaurant, kedai2 tepi jalan semua lah.

kenangan kenangan.
bila masak kat rumah sewa tu, besttt sebab masak dengan kawan2. aku buat ni, ko buat tu, dia buat nun, bak kata semua ada tugas masing2, tapi kadang2 yang aktif masak tu sorang dua orang je, yang lain menadah pinggan :D

seriously, aku rasa cepat sangat sangat sangat masa berlalu sekarang ni, dunia akhir zaman macam ni lah. kejap je setahun, kejap je dua tahun alih alih dah sampai 6 tahun dah. tapi ALHAMDULILLAH, 6 tahun ni dah banyak mengajar aku macam2 benda dari a-z, sekecil kecil benda sampai sebesar besar benda.

so, what's next? semua orang akan buat hal masing2, menuju je jalan yang ALLAH dah tetapkan untuk kita semua. memang akan payah dah nak kumpul2 semua orang mcm sekarang. dan tak terkejut kalau2 nak buat reunion nanti, dah ada kawan2 yang usung anak2 sampai 5 orang ke apa(ok, ini exaggeration) hahahahaha dan tak terkejut pun kalau ada yang nak terima menantu dah pun(ok, ini sekali lagi exaggeration).

sedar tak sedar dah masuk ke peringkat umur dewasa dah pun. jadi perangai pun kenalah seiring dengan peningkatan umur, tak gitu :P

oklah, dah takde idea. sebenarnya, takde anything specific in mind pun, but i think i have to make the momentum rolling, supaya sentiasa maintain dan istiqamah dan hal tulis menulis ni. tulis saje, nanti2 adelah tu benda yang nak dicakapkan.

sebab tu post ni macam agak bercampur gaul macam nasi kerabu je, sebab aku dah tak tahu nak cakap pasal apa, so merapu dulu lama2 baru serious skit :D

till, then

salam and bye bye

tak berperasaan =.='

salam and hi to all,

i had this mixed feelings rite now and it seemed like i hate this kind of emotion =.='
i don't know why i had this feeling and it had actually buggering me for quite couple of days already.

hmmmm...macam mana ye nak describe kan perasaan ni? apa yang aku rasa sebenarnya?
betullah pepatah cakap, 'don't judge a book by its cover' true indeed huh?

nampak saje aku senyum @ gelak tapi dalam hati siapa yang tahu? mereka dan keluarga mereka saja.

by the way, aku tak tahu sama ada aku dah buat benda yang betul atau tidak. rasanya ni kot yang ganggu fikiran aku semenjak dua menjak ni.

reminiscence the good ol'days :)

salam and hi to all,

it's been quite a while since i stepped in this blog *sambil membuang sawang2 disana sini*
well, i'm not that busy but it's just the feeling of lazy which makes me hard to write anything. i do visit my blog, almost everyday but i don't feel like writing yet.

so, here i am, with new resolution to start blogging again :)
to start with, i'll tell about the end of my 6 years of studies.

officially, it has ended. THE END.
yes, those six years of tears, turmoils, laughters, sacrifices, tensions, assignments, grades, problems, tests and exams has officially ended.
i deemed this is not the end yet, but it's actually the start of everything.
i'll soon join my sister into this whole new world, the working world and will yet to be the working people. i guess the feeling would definitely be different from what i feel now.
huh! don't know what to expect anymore. mixed feelings actually.

ok. enough said. this post should be about my sadness of the end of my study, instead i wrote about the uncertanties of what future shall bring me to =.='

of all my life, i think those 6 years really taught me a LOT.
of how to be a mature woman, how to adapt myself with surrounding, how to react in different situations, how to befriend people etc.
i learn A LOT, and yes, i can actually see the changes and differences between the old me and the new me, and i think i like the new me better :P

i still remember the day i got the offer from KPM to enrol in this course, my answer was definitely a NO-NO. teaching was never in my list *cey masa ni berlagak lagi, jadi cikgu tak glamer*
until my parents had to call me every now and then to persuade me to accept the offer, still i remember my mom's word hahahahahaha.
she said " Na, kalau Na lelaki, ma dop kesah Na jadi mende, engineer ke, doktor ke, akauntan ke apa ke, tapi skrang ni Na pompuan, tu yang ma kesah sikit, kalau jadi cikgu ni senang, kerja ada, gaji ada, cuti pun banyak, kerja sekerat hari je"
then she added, " cikgu ni ramai peminat, orang lelaki pun ramai nak buat bini"
wah! never thought this kind of word will slipped out from my mom's tongue. hahhahahahahha
*still gelak2 sampai sekarang bila teringat kisah ini*

then, my father, who never called if there's no anything important, out of blue, called me every night just to persuade me to accept the offer.
he even called me when i'm out to toilet to brush teeth, sampai macam tu sekali punya sokongan!

so, here i am, accepting the offer because of MY PARENTS and if it was not because of them, i would never be what i am today!
my mother used to say to me that "tengoklah mcm tu sekali sokongan ma dgn pa ke Na"
and up till i was in my first year degree, she still asked me how am i coping with the studies and everything.

YA ALLAH, i'm very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very grateful to have them. and All praises are due to You, the one and only the Almighty ALLAH. never did i know i'm that lucky :) :) :)

but. those were the days
the days when everything started to give impact on me

and now, i'm counting days for my graduation and working world

so catch ya later.
till then,
salam and bye bye

* i know this post seems a bit incomplete, but hehehehehe i just dont have any ideas to write anymore*

i can't think of any suitable title

it's 5.01 am in the morning, and here i am, still up from morning. my aim is to finish up my write ups, but i guess i just cant resist the temptation to blogwalking.

i'm halfway done actually, but i don't think sleeping at this hour will let me wake up for subuh prayers, on time. so i decided to wait for the adzan and take my beauty sleep afterwards.

after all, hopefully at this kind of hour, ideas will flow like a waterfall! i really need inspiration to write and ideas too! HELP HELP =.='

so, what i'm going to write next? hmmmmm....let's see.

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oklah, sambung blik je keja tdi tu. bertangguh itu pencuri masa :P

bye bye